Wow

So, I got slightly sad news on Saturday. The VYM girls got their site assignments for after orientation, and it turns out that one of the girls that I have been closest to has been assigned to Niigata. We had been told at the beginning of orientation that all of them would be in the Tokyo area, so it was a sad surprise to learn that she will not be. Not that I even know for sure that *I* will be in the Tokyo area yet, but still...

So, I was feeling a little lonely today. Or, not so much lonely, I guess, as kind of alone. This will be the sixth time in my life that either a best friend has moved away from me or I've moved away from them. I feel really ready to throw away even pretending stability is possible for me. And it seems like realizing that no person can make me feel stable is to realize that I am alone.

However, in the past 48 hours, I have received no fewer than four emails all from friends or family members back home just as random 'I'm thinking of you' sorts of emails. I don't usually get random 'I'm thinking of you' emails. It was just really cool...none of them knew I was going through anything. So, though I am still feeling cynical about the prospects of having a best friend who sticks around for longer than five years (let alone six months), I am not alone. Yay for random reminders of that!